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What are the behavioural types by the abuser and the effects of domestic abuse on the victim?

Domestic Abuse Awareness

Destructive criticism and verbal abuse

  • Shouting
  • Mocking
  • Accusing
  • Name calling
  • Verbally threatening

Pressure tactics

  • Sulking
  • Threatening to withhold money
  • Disconnecting the telephone
  • Taking the car away
  • Threatening to commit suicide
  • Taking the children away
  • Reporting you to welfare agencies unless you comply with his or her demands regarding bringing up the children
  • Lying to your friends and family about you
  • Telling you that you have no choice in any decisions


  • Persistently putting you down in front of other people
  • Not listening or responding when you talk
  • Interrupting your telephone calls
  • Taking money from your purse without asking
  • Refusing to help with childcare or housework

Breaking trust

  • Lying to you
  • Withholding information from you
  • Being jealous
  • Having other relationships
  • Breaking promises and shared agreements


  • Monitoring or blocking your telephone calls
  • Telling you where you can and cannot go
  • Preventing you from seeing friends and relatives


  • Following you
  • Checking up on you
  • Opening your mail
  • Repeatedly checking to see who has telephoned you
  • Embarrassing you in public


  • Making angry gestures
  • Using physical size to intimidate
  • Shouting you down
  • Destroying your possessions
  • Breaking things
  • Punching walls
  • Wielding a knife or a gun
  • Threatening to kill you and children/family members

Sexual violence

  • Using force
  • Threats or intimidation to make you perform sexual acts
  • Having sex with you when you don't want to have sex
  • Any degrading treatment based on your sexual orientation

Physical violence

  • Punching
  • Slapping
  • Hitting
  • Biting
  • Pinching
  • Kicking
  • Pulling hair out
  • Pushing
  • Shoving
  • Burning
  • Strangling


  • Saying the abuse doesn't happen
  • Saying you caused the abusive behaviour
  • Being publicly gentle and patient
  • Crying and begging for forgiveness
  • Saying it will never happen again




Updated: 30 Oct 2017
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